Math...

Polynomials, Quadratic equations, WHAT THE BLAZES WAS I THINKING?

Okay so I just finished one five-week course in college math, and after a one-week break, I now get to fire up the ol' noodle and start another one. Can I just tell you... I'm sick to my stomach? What in the world am I doing back in college? I'm too old for this. I'm too old for a LOT of what I'm doing lately, I think.

This is what happens though, when you don't go to college right out of high school. This is what happens when you're nearly thirty-six, and you've got to grow up. Mom of four kids, having to be an example, having to live the life even as I've got one graduating high school this year. My eldest and I could actually graduate college at the same time. Scary thought, that. I'm on a course to complete my BS in Business, with my major in Marketing from the University of Phoenix. At one point, I thought I wanted to be an engineer. Knowing tons of engineers in my current profession, I now know that I have WAY too much personality (and too much mouth) to be an effective engineer. I talk too much, I'm too loud, too brash, too bold, too extroverted...

Too everything.

But then again... I'm that way for a lot of people I guess, and not just engineers. I had a rough day at work today. There have been a few of those lately. I'm suffering from a lack of direction, and a lack of balance. I think my boss is as well, and he is taking it out on me. He and I are both Taureans, and we tend to take our frustrations out on one another. Unfortunately, those frustrations leave bruises that don't easily heal. He's been under a lot of pressure, and although he may end up a diamond... This lump of coal is being pulverized into dust.

Time to give up the hero worship, again. Time to move on, I think. He's a very good man and I'm just too emotionally fragile right now to take the bruising.

Then again, maybe I'm just in need of sleep... a rest before another day at work and before math class.